


What You Don't Know About Me

by Crazy_Pairing_Person



Category: Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, Nonbinary Character, Other, Regret, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-10
Updated: 2017-12-10
Packaged: 2019-02-12 20:11:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12967494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crazy_Pairing_Person/pseuds/Crazy_Pairing_Person
Summary: Had one asked Nomi before meeting Randy Cunningham if they regretted what they'd done, they likely would have said yes. They'd learned their lesson in 800 years of teaching ninjas. When the curse was over - only 200 years left - they intended, had intended, to change their ways.But now, knowing Randy, knowing that they would not have met him if they had not done what they had, Nomi actually finds themselfnotregretting it. And that can't be good.





	What You Don't Know About Me

**Author's Note:**

> Where did the chaos pearls come from? How did the Nomicon come to be?
> 
> If you like angst, this fic answers both of those questions.
> 
> ...Assuming neither of those questions were answered in canon. I may just be a complete moron, who the fuck knows.

Nomi is familiar with many negative emotions. Resentment, hatred, anger... The emotions are comforting old blankets, familiar and well-worn out.

But like all well-worn out things, they must eventually be tossed away. As comfortable as it is to be resentful of the man who cursed them, they have to admit that the man had reason.

They did bring into existence the single most dangerous things known to mankind. They brought into existence the one thing that could destroy the world.

Nomi brought chaos pearls into existence.

Prior to their curse, prior to becoming a book, Nomi would have defended themself, stating that it had been a harmless prank like all the others. Like the man-eating raven that had eaten half their family. Like the dragon that had torched the other half. Like the demons they had summoned to torment innocent people.

It was truly no wonder why everyone had grown fearful of his presence. He saw, had seen, joy in tormenting others and in destroying lives.

All except the man who'd cursed him was scared of him. That man had tried to gently coax him from the darkness.

But then they'd brought out chaos pearls. They'd been a 'harmless' experiment. A harmless experiment that had destroyed towns, corrupted souls.

One could argue that the souls had already been corrupted, being that they had been tempted in the first place, but that was a useless argument when one actually considered what had happened.

The man had reached the end of his rope with Nomi, and had cursed them.

One could argue that Nomi had done Norrisville a favor. Without them, the ninja would have never come to be.

Being a book for 800 years gave one some perspective. Being a book that was forced to teach ninjas how to save the town, save a town that wouldn't be in danger if not for themself, gave one even more perspective.

Nomi began to genuinely regret what they had done.

So, yes, Nomi is still familiar with negative emotions. Different ones now. Self-hatred and regret mainly. Not that they would ever let this on to the ninjas.

Not that they would ever let this on to Randy.

* * *

"Hey, Nomi? Were you ever not a book?"

"I am not a book now," Nomi replies, staring blankly at the ceiling from their place on the floor.

"You know what I mean."

Nomi sighs. "Why do you care?" they ask, careful to hide the pain that comes from remembering their past.

"Just curious."

Nomi is silent. Randy waits.

"Yes."

"What happened?" he asks instantly.

"I was cursed."

Randy hops down from his bed to crawl over Nomi, and stare at their face. "What do you mean?"

"If I tell you what happened, you'll never trust me again. Not as your teacher, not as your lover, and definitely not as a person."

"Try me. Whatever you did couldn't be that bad."

Nomi raises an eyebrow. "It could and it is."

"How so?"

Nomi sits up. Their stomach is churning with nerves that they are careful not to show on their face. Randy doesn't pick up on it, so they guess that they do a fine enough job.

"I created the chaos pearls."

Randy's comforting smile falls, as Nomi expected it to.

"You... What?"

"I created the-"

"I _heard_ you! What I mean is,  _why_ would you do that?!  _Why_ would you keep it from me?! What the _juice_?!"

Nomi blinks, tries to seem calm. "They were meant to be a harmless prank-"

"A  _harmless prank_ ," Randy repeats through clenched teeth. "Yeah. Sure."

Randy stands, starts pacing. "So, what, because of you doing that, you got cursed?"

"It was more like that was just the straw that broke the camel's back. I'd done plenty of other things before that, too."

"Oh my  _god_." Randy looks sick. "You... You're... You... Oh my god." He fists his purple hair in his fingers. "Am I going to have to kill you or something? Is that why you became human so suddenly?"

"No. That is because I fell in love with you, and the man who cursed me took pity on me when I did."

"Well whoop-dee-fucking-doo. That makes up for you creating the most  _deadly and dangerous things in existence_."

Nomi shrugs. "I never said it did." Then, finally, letting their emotions bleed into their voice, "If it helps at all, I do regret it."

"You should," Randy snaps. "You put so many people in danger by doing that."

"I know."

Nomi lays back down. Randy is not going to calm down any time soon. "You can go to Howard's if you want. I'm sure you'd rather not be around me anymore."

Here, finally, Randy falters. He knows Nomi hates to be away from Randy in this form, so he seems to finally get that Nomi regrets what they did. "I... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled, I just..."

"I did warn you that you wouldn't like it. That you wouldn't trust me."

"I wouldn't say that I don't trust you," Randy says quickly. "Just... I didn't expect... B-but people can change, so..."

"I have regretted what I did for the past 800 years. I have 200 left before my curse will finally be over and I can just be human again."

"Which means..."

"That this form is not permanent. I consider myself lucky to be with you like this for the time that I have been, and I will still consider myself lucky even if it should end tomorrow." They pause. "But obviously, ideally, it will last much longer than that."

"Yeah," Randy says softly. "Ideally."

But ideally, Nomi wouldn't have created such a deadly thing to begin with - and yet, here they were.

...Would they have met if they had not done that, though?

Nomi wonders if it's wrong to be a little bit grateful for what they did, just because it meant that they could meet Randy.

It probably is.

 


End file.
